Self-Acceptance

We had a snow weekend! Fortunately, we didn’t get as much snow as was predicted, and it’s not nearly as bitterly cold as was predicted either. Because of the snow and the cold, we held yoga classes online. It was so much fun to see who showed up for class, and I think some were encouraged by my “Zoom is not scary” email. 

Today I want to share with you a meditation I offered in restorative yoga class. Several people told me they found it to be meaningful and helpful, and I wish the same for you. 

As we begin a new year we are usually encouraged—even expected—to make resolutions or set intentions for the year ahead. These are always meant to be active projections for making our lives better, being more successful in our business, or working on relationships. And on the surface this doesn’t seem like a bad thing. Who wouldn’t want to experience better things in the coming months? 

But if you look below the surface of these resolutions you will see something concerning—they are built on the assumption that something is lacking in our life, or that there is some flaw in our character that we have to fix. A resolution or intention is really only needed if all is not right with our world.

As you look at the resolutions you’ve made in the past you might ask yourself two questions: “Am I better off for having made these resolutions in the past?” and “How quickly did I abandon my resolutions?” 

This year I recommend trying a different kind of resolution, one that is rooted in loving your life and accepting yourself. Here is how it showed up for me this week: The past two weeks have been challenging for me because we lost heat at the studio. We haven’t been able to meet there so I have had to cancel classes and appointments or move them online. And we had a major winter storm move into the area this week with all of the preparations that required. As a result, I felt anxiety amid the uncertainty. 

If I was doing a traditional resolution I could isolate anxiety as a character flaw I needed to work on. If I just work on the anxiety I’ll feel better, right? But is that realistic? I can pretty much guarantee that I will feel this anxiety again in another situation because no one escapes it! Instead, I accepted that anxiety was arising for me and tried to lean into it, get on the edge of it, peer into the other side. And when I did that I discovered it is not as scary as I thought it was. I set this resolution:

“I will allow anxiety to just be. I lean into it and accept myself as I am.”

Let’s meditate on this: Sit or lie down in a quiet place where you will not be disturbed. Think back over the past week or month and look for ways in which you felt overwhelmed or otherwise struggled with your life. Pick one thing that arises for you, something that you might normally want to “fix” because it embarrasses you or because you think of it as a character flaw. Rather than push it away or try to fix it, lean into it. Get right on the edge and peer into the other side. Set your resolution:

“I will allow _______ to just be. I lean into it and accept myself as I am.”

Remain here for 5-10 minutes, then take three deep breaths, slowly get up and move back into your day with confidence, acceptance and peace.